The Fine line Between Saving Treasures and Hoarding “Family Heirlooms”
We all know the expression, “One person’s trash is another person’s treasure.” Never is this phrase put more to the test when trying to declutter or downsize one’s own home. It is hard! What if I throw away something I later regret? Or what if it’s a valuable piece of history? Could this family heirloom be something important or actually worth something? What if… it’s the key to a family story?
The questions we ask ourselves when sorting through our things are overwhelming and paralyzing.
Judging other people’s “stuff” is easy. I do this every time I watch Antiques Roadshow and see something ridiculous, weird, or downright ugly. I want to scream at the tv…”nobody wants that piece of crap you’ve had in your attic for fifty years!” Unless it looks like my crap. Then, suddenly I’m on the edge of my seat.
Of course, I can’t help but think of my “treasures” and how future generations will likely see them as junk. I mentally take notes of things that have economic value. Watching the show, however, I realize most of the time, the things we’ve cherished out of ancestral obligation don’t have much financial worth. Sure, there is the occasional “wow” moment on the. Still, the generational consumer is fickle. The line between worth and worthless of any old object is shaky at best, as evident by the changing “now and then” valuations. Add to that the old, blurred lens of family history, and the line between treasure and trash can be downright fuzzy.
It’s The Sentimental “Stuff” That Gives Us Pause
For many of us, the idea of letting go of family memorabilia can be a difficult one. We are sentimental creatures; we often fill our homes with treasured items that remind us of our loved ones and the memories we’ve shared. But there comes a time when we must consider whether the things we hold onto are truly treasures or just clutter.
So, the question is: are you saving treasure or hoarding trash?
Firstly, let’s define what we mean by family memorabilia. These items have sentimental value and are typically passed down from generation to generation. They can include anything from old photographs and letters to furniture and jewelry. (Learn more about what we mean by Family Heirlooms.)
While our parents or grandparents may have treasured these items, it’s important to remember that our attachment to them may not be as strong. And let’s be honest, it weakens considerably with each generation unless new memories are imprinted on these old things.
When deciding whether to keep or let go of family memorabilia, there are a few things to consider:
Does the item hold emotional value for you? If an item brings up happy memories and makes you feel connected to your loved ones, it’s worth considering keeping it.
Does the item serve a practical purpose? Some family memorabilia may have practical uses, such as a piece of furniture or a set of dishes. If you can use the item daily, it’s worth keeping it. If you follow me on Instagram, you know one of my favorite and practical family heirlooms is a 1913 Roberts Lightning Mixer. It’s my “go-to” whipped cream maker.
Is the item taking up valuable space? If you aren’t using or enjoying an object and it’s taking up valuable space in your home, it’s worth letting it go.
Can the item be passed down to another family member who will treasure it? Suppose you have children, nieces or nephews, or other family members who would appreciate and cherish the item. In that case, it’s worth considering passing it down to them.
Ultimately, deciding to keep or let go of family memorabilia is personal. However, it’s important to remember that letting go of certain items doesn’t mean letting go of your memories or connection to your loved ones. By keeping only the things that indeed hold value for you, you can create a clutter-free home filled with treasured memories rather than the keeper of other people’s junk.
And if you do decide to let things go, be sure you’re capturing the stories. Learn more about How to Safeguard Family Stories.
What About You?
Have you ever held on to family memorabilia, only to decide later you were just holding on to someone else’s junk?
As an heirloom explorer, I’m a huge advocate of finding and using your family’s treasures. Scroll any table-setting hashtag on Instagram, and you will find stunning tables bursting with vintage treasures. A beautiful table covered with gorgeous plates, vibrant textiles, delicate flowers, sparkly silverware, and robust wine goblets is a lovely way to use these heirlooms. Mixing generations’ worth of tableware puts them to use again and makes the occasion feel like a family reunion, or a dinner at Downton Abbey.
But did you know there is a hidden danger of using old china and crystal? Its name is lead and it can be lurking in your crystal and china.
So what exactly is lead?
If you purchased a home after 1992, you probably became aware of the use of lead in paint. This is because disclosure of lead-based paint became a requirement for the sale or lease of a building. In San Francisco, where I lived, we changed all our water pipes to copper pipes because it was common to use lead in the pipes and fittings.
But how does this relate to your grandparent’s dish sets and beloved crystal?
This Instagram of my mother-in-laws vintage crystal cruet set post sparked a small conversation about lead in crystal. Because so many of my followers share my love of family heirlooms and vintage finds, I wanted to share some more thoughts about the dangers of lead when using old crystal and china.
Lead crystal is a type of glass that contains up to 24% lead. Lead has been used in crystal production for centuries. It adds weight, sparkle, and brilliance to wine glasses, decanters, vases, and other decorative items.
You may have seen the warning labels when you’ve purchased food and beverage containers that may contain lead, such as the Prop 65 Warning labels in California. (ooooh, those really do mean something!)
The main concern with lead crystal is that it can release lead into the air or liquids that come into contact with it. For example, wine stored in a lead crystal decanter can absorb lead from the decanter. This lead can then be consumed, especially when the lead crystal is exposed to acidic liquids like lemon, vinegar, or (gasp) wine. In 1992, the American Journal of Public Health published an article of a specific study done to identify the potential lead exposure in crystal decanters. The conclusion was after a 10-day storage in lead decanters, there was 10 to 212 times the regulatory level of lead in the liquid.
Okay, but what about those china dishes?
Unfortunately, lead is not just in glasses and decanters. The glazing process used in earthenware pottery often contains lead, which can facilitate the melting of glaze particles. When properly fused, the risk of lead exposure is minimal. However, lead can contaminate food when it’s not fused correctly.
How do you know if your ceramicware was properly fused?
Luckily the Food & Drug Administration in the United States provides manufacturing guidance and labeling requirements for new ceramic products.
However, second-hand, antique, damaged, and hand-made pieces are considered “problematic .” The FDA even states in its guidance on ceramicware that “brightly decorated orange, red, and yellow are highly susceptible sources of lead in ceramics because lead is used in the pigment to increase its intensity.”
While the FDA gives guidance on food and beverage containers, it’s worth noting decorative items may have different or even less rigorous guidelines and warnings. Knowing that items not typically used for food or drinks may contain lead is essential for people looking to use old things in new ways, such as myself.
How do you know which china, crystal, or cut glass has lead?
Most of our heirlooms or thrifted finds do not have these warning labels. So how can we even tell if our crystal and china contain lead?
A couple of methods can help you figure out if your family heirlooms contain lead. However, It’s important to note that these methods are not foolproof. Of course, when in doubt, the safest thing is not to use it for human consumption.
Try a Lead Test Kit which can be purchased in hardware stores. Simply wipe the test on suspected pieces of crystal or china and it will return a positive or negative result. I have not used them, so I can’t verify their accuracy, but I’m told they exist.
Test the sound. Often, you can tell the difference between leaded crystal glass by the “ping .” Leaded glass will have a nice chime ring, while regular glass will have a duller, shorter sound.
Feel the weight. Check the weight: Lead-based glass is typically heavier than regular glass, so if a piece of glass feels much heavier than you expect, it may contain lead.
Find the rainbow. My mom had so much leaded crystal that when the sun hit the room at a certain angle, the room would light up with rainbows.
Check the cuts. Leaded crystal cuts tend to be softer, while glass cuts tend to be sharper.
What can you do to protect yourself and your family from lead in crystal?
The first step is to know what you are buying. Look for products that are labeled “lead-free” or “crystal-free .” These products are made from glass or other materials that do not contain lead.
You should always take precautions when using vintage or antique china and crystal. Avoid using lead crystal for items that come into direct contact with food or drink, such as glasses, plates, and bowls. Instead, try using them in decorative ways.
The Bottom Line on Lead
Lead is a harmful toxin, and lead in crystal and china is a serious concern. It should should not be taken lightly. To protect your and your family’s health, it’s essential to be informed and take the necessary precautions. If you have any concerns about lead in your crystal or china, consider admiring, rather than using them.
For further reading, below is a summary of all the agency links regarding lead included in this post.
If you’ve learned something, I would be grateful if you could share this post with a friend who might unaware of the potential for lead in their vintage crystal and china.
Are you the legacy keeper in your family? The person who has a passion for genealogy and family history? Has your garage become a repository for all the family treasures, neatly tucked away until you can start safeguarding all those family stories? If this sounds like you, and you need a little motivation or inspiration on how to preserve those family memories, read on.
Preserving family stories is a passion of mine, but it can often become overwhelming. There just doesn’t seem to be a clear beginning, and the ending often seems far, far away. Yet, I understand the importance of it, and yes, I REALLY want to do safeguard these stories. Still, life gets in the way – a lot.
Luckily, there are many resources out there to help you keep those memories alive in whatever way works for you. Today, I’m sharing tips, tricks, and resources I’ve discovered to help you preserve your family’s stories. Read on to learn more about:
How to start capturing family stories,
Tips and tricks to begin tackling the project yourself,
My favorite accounts to inspire and guide you, and
Online resources you to help you
So dust off those old photos, grab grandma’s vintage baubles, and let’s start capturing those treasured family stories.
Whenever I’m asked how to start capturing family stories, my flippant answer is, “any way you want.” But really, I’m not trying to be facetious. If writing interests you, researching and capturing family stories is a great outlet to improve your craft. It’s a constant stream of new and interesting content, especially when you uncover something unexpected, such as an old, handwritten poetry book.
But we don’t need to be great writers to capture our stories.
We make things hard on ourselves when we try to create the perfect story with a beginning, middle, and end. Or we try to capture the classic “hero’s journey” where the person is living their life, and suddenly something monumental changes their trajectory. With struggle and perseverance, they overcome great odds and live happily ever after. (Hello, Disney.)
But writing a family story doesn’t have to be all words. Capturing stories visually is also a great way to preserve and safeguard a family story. Take a picture, add the what and when, and you have a story. It can be as simple as that.
This is precisely how I started.
I decided to use my Heirloom Explorer Instagram account to capture my family’s stories. Instagram is a visual medium, so it naturally lends itself to visual storytelling. Photos of my favorite heirlooms are my “writing prompts”. I add small captions to capture what the artifacts are and why I love them. Of course, I also use this blog for long-form storytelling, such as What Secrets Does This Vintage Mantel Clock Hold?.
Heirlooms and family stories pair nicely; after all, it’s mostly the story of the heirlooms that keeps us attached to the items.
– Lisa L. Duncan, Heirloom Explorer
Tips and Tricks for Tackling the Project Yourself
If you’re the one capturing your family stories, I applaud you! This is a BIG undertaking now, but it will be greatly valued by future generations. But, like all significant undertakings, capturing stories yourself can also feel overwhelming.
I often THINK more about “needing to capture more stories” than actually capturing more stories. And then there is the constant realization that what we are doing is truly never-ending. During these moments of overwhelm and paralysis, I need to remind myself that any progress made is a gift to future generations. Any story, big or small, with words or visuals, is progress.
As one of my favorite authors, Anne Lamott, would say, “bird by bird.”
Choosing what or who to write about and how you want to write can be daunting. An easy way to start is to list 3-5 stories or people you want to capture and then rank them in order of importance. You must rank them according to your preference rather than someone else’s; after all, you are the one that needs to stay motivated! I think three to five is a good goal if you’re serious about making progress. It’s more than “one and done,” and still an achievable goal.
Eliminate Decision Paralysis
Often, we end up procrastinating because we have too many choices. Try eliminating decision paralysis by tossing a one-sentence reminder of the story in a bowl (or perhaps a vintage vessel). Then, challenge yourself to pick one story to expand on each week or month, or whatever pace works for you. It’s an easy way to create a habit, and it’s not a bad New Year’s Resolution!
Embrace “Good Enough For Now”
Let’s face it, capturing stories over multiple lifetimes is never-ending. There’s always one more anecdote, one more memory, or one more ancestor to add. Remove “done” from your mindset and focus on “good enough for now.” This little shift releases the need to have a story be “perfect” before moving on to something else. It also leaves the door open for you, or someone else, to revisit in the future.
Accounts That Will Inspire and Guide You
Now for the fun part. A little inspiration goes a long way in getting those creative juices flowing, so I want to share a few of my favorite Instagram accounts with you. Some of these accounts offer their services for a fee, but they also provide a wealth of information to their followers for free. I hope you check them out.
(Full disclosure: I have not paid for these services, nor am I getting paid to promote these services. These are simply accounts that inspire me.)
Storytelling Inspiration
The Art of Recollection
One of my favorite accounts that I’ve followed since nearly the beginning of my journey on Instagram is @artofrecollection. She discusses why she chose Instagram as the story-telling medium of choice on her website, The Art of Recollection.
Her feed is full of beautiful old family photos, and her captions blend thoughtful reflections, historical perspectives, and specific details about the picture. Her writing style creates a feeling of knowing the person in the picture and exploring what their life might have been like. She also generously shares how she researches and preserves her family stories.
Recently, she started to capture facts and stories of family members using “playing cards,” which she purchased and modified from @thecreativefamilyhistorian. I love this idea and may have to add this to my 2023 New Years’ Resolution list!
Hiring a professional writer to capture a family story is a marvelous gift. Dawn Roode is a personal biographer and the face behind @modernheirloom. An accomplished editor, Dawn’s storytelling process begins with one-on-one interviews. She also reviews photos, artifacts, and memorabilia to help identify important storylines for the biography. She then turns these stories into beautiful keepsake books.
Her Instagram feed offers a wealth of information for people wanting to capture their own family stories. She also has several free guides and templates available in her bio link. Be sure to check out her “Thanksgiving Family History Guide,” “Christmas Family History Questions,” and “How to Use Photos as Prompts for Writing Life Stories.”
If you’re looking for a truly unique way to preserve sentimental objects or artifacts, check out @theheirloomist. Shana Novak is the professional photographer behind this account. She takes stunning photos of family heirlooms and preserves them by creating beautiful keepsake posters. A look through her feed feels like a stroll through a photo gallery. It’s also a reminder that family heirlooms come in all shapes and sizes, including an old tucked away matchbook or a treasured tee shirt.
I especially love this idea for fragile heirlooms or as a way to share those really sentimental objects that everyone wants, but can’t physically be shared.
Finally, I want to include a few photo organization accounts I follow. Most of us come to this place of capturing stories because we have or have been “gifted” boxes of old family photos, and we want to preserve their stories.
While these accounts offer paid services to digitize family photo collections, they also share tips and strategies for doing this yourself, including how to organize your digital photos going forward. (I’m especially grateful for the reminder posts to clear out all those screenshots from your phone!) These accounts are definitely worth checking out if this is a project on your “to-do” list, and future generations will thank you. Many local photography studios also offer photo digitization services.
Now that you’ve seen some inspiring accounts, I want to share a few more resources to help guide your research and writing.
I recently attended a family history conference by the New York Genealogical and Biographical Society. It was the first time I had ever been to such an event, and it was a mountain of information.
One of the presentations was by Kyle Hurst, titled “Adding Story to Family History.” Kyle is a Senior Genealogist of the Newbury Street Press, a family history publishing arm of American Ancestors or The New England Historic Genealogical Society. She offered several tips and ideas on how to write a family history through the lens of a biographer. While her presentation is no longer available, the NYGS website has excellent resources on Getting Started With Your Family History.
American Ancestors offers on-demand courses for a fee, including one that caught my eye: Digitizing Your Family History Collections which is available until January 31, 2023.
How about capturing family stories through recipes?
This free lecture on December 8, 2022, from the Brue Family Learning Center on Family Recipes, is sure to spark some ideas. When my parent’s celebrated their 50th Wedding Anniversary, we created a family recipe book using the online book publishing service Blurb. We collected family recipes, added favorite photos for each recipe, and commented about how the recipes became family favorites. It’s a fun way to preserve your family recipes AND safeguard your family stories!
Tell Me What You Think
How do you preserve and safeguard your family stories for future generations? Do you have some favorite accounts you follow? Tell me in the comments or send me a message @heirloomexplorer. I’d love to hear from you.
If you’re new here, welcome! I invite you to check out my other posts on Heirloom Explorer.
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